How to deliver a eulogy

Writing an eulogy and delivering it are two separate undertakings. While delivering a eulogy is a great privilege,  for many people the experience of delivering a eulogy can be emotionally overwhelming.

Below are our tips to help you deliver a good eulogy at a funeral:

Days prior to delivering the eulogy

It’s okay to be nervous

Public speaking is never an easy task, even the most experienced of public speakers still get nervous before they stand up in front of a crowd, no matter how many times they’ve done it. Any nerves that you feel leading up to and during the delivery of the speech is completely normal.

Practice, practice and practice some more

After you’ve written the eulogy, you might not want to look at it again until the funeral, but practicing really will help to calm your nerves.

Reading out loud will help you to find the natural places to pause, as well as help you make any improvements. Read aloud to trusted friends and family too. They will give you helpful advice and encouragement.

Remember to practice speaking slowly. It is normal to want to try and rush it, but reading slowly will help you feel more in control.

Try to memorise the eulogy

Memorising your eulogy, or parts of it, will help you feel comfortable. Having the eulogy memorised will encourage you to look up at your audience, as well as make it easier for you if you are reading it and lose your spot.

Make sure to have a written copy on hand when delivering the speech. This will relieve stress and help you if you forget any parts (which is completely normal too).

On the day of delivering the eulogy

Breathe

Nothing helps calm the nerves by taking a few big, deep breaths. Before you start, breathe in and out a couple of times to centre yourself. Remember that you’re doing this to honour your loved one and that’s all that matters.

If you need to take more deep breaths during the eulogy, that’s completely fine, no one is expecting you to be a professional at this. Use your breath to also help slow down your speech and connect with the audience.

Have a bottle of water in front of you

Along with your written speech and tissues, bring a bottle of water up with you. Taking a sip of water will calm you and prevent your mouth from drying out.

If you find that you are getting quite emotional, a cool drink of water will give you time to collect yourself and your thoughts. This can help you find the strength to keep going.

Take your time

While you may have been advised on the amount of time you have allocated to deliver the eulogy, try not to think about this too much. You are there to share memories and honour your loved one’s life.

Taking your time will also help you to connect with the audience, which will in turn really help them appreciate the words you are saying.

Don’t worry if you get emotional

Giving a eulogy at a funeral is an emotional task to perform, you are talking about someone who meant a great deal to you, who you miss and are grieving; it’s completely normal to be upset.

If you feel tears coming as you’re delivering the eulogy, let them come.

Remember the reason you are doing this

If at any time you feel worried or scared about how your delivery is going, your loved one would be proud of you for having the courage to stand up in front of an audience and share memories and stories of their life.

Above all, remember that the audience understands how hard it is give a eulogy and no one is judging your public speaking skills. Also, remember the reason why you are doing this, you are helping to celebrate your loved one’s life.

Funeral Planner provides you with sample eulogies that are here to help inspire you. They will give you some direction for the eulogy you are about to write. By reading these eulogy examples you might find they help lessen the burden of putting pen to paper and give you a starting point to start off your own collection of thoughts.